Hello Day 5 :)


I haven’t seen a day 5 since my bowel obstruction last summer. Seriously.

I learned something about rewards yesterday. It is not a reward to “do” a chore. I thought baking cookies or cleaning a drawer in my nightstand would be a reward because I would feel good when it was done.

What did feel good was taking a break after lunch, going to my bedroom & reading, drinking Christmas tea and munching cookies. My brain took a break from thinking.

On a normal day, I get up at 4 am to have time for myself. By 6 I am dressed and getting the dog & kids taken care of. Out the door at 730 dropping everyone off and at work by 830. I go non stop with 4 offices & 17 staff. Lunch is when I sit in front of my computer & catch up on emails. Leave office before 6 and home to dog & kids and in bed at 730.

I couldn’t keep up the pace. I was so exhausted that I would grab wine everynight to stay awake & functioning until bed. It calmed me down and chased away the exhaustion for an extra hour or two.

After these few days at home and no wine I can see clearer that going too hard set up a cycle of exhaustion and drinking. I don’t want to choose this anymore. I can go sit in my car and read at lunch, or instead of take out Chinese for lunch I can go sit there and eat and read. Gettting out of my own head for a while will help me make more efficient decisions in the afternoon.

Today will be an interesting challenge as I have too many things already going on that need to happen. I have scheduled another bedroom reading date with myself after lunch, but I may not be home. I think I will bring my book with me and stop what I am doing and sit and read and eat. No work.

I’m off and running as my first stop is a meeting with the superintendent of the school. A good meeting for my son, but a crazy start to my day.

*so glad to re-read this, starting to get too busy again, slow down!

One thought on “Hello Day 5 :)

  1. Finding a few moments of personal time is important.mit sounds like you need it!
    When you reqlly think about it the wine is not relaxing you. It is a depressant and it just makes everything else seem bleak.
    5 days is great! Stick with it.

    Liked by 1 person

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