The Day 50 That Almost Wasn’t

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The story ended at Day 45 last time. Then it took 5 more months to get it back.

The ten days between 40 & 50 days have been hard. Too hard to even talk about. No crisis. Just regular life, on the downish side of life’s ups and downs.

Hard in the sense of alcohol cravings. I don’t want them. Not the alcohol or the cravings.

I wanted some more calm and happy, some more time to gather strength to face the cravings. And I really didn’t want to reach out to talk about it.

Why? …I dunno…Just cuz…

See, that’s why I didn’t want to talk about it. Cuz…I just don’t know.

Know what I mean?

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6 thoughts on “The Day 50 That Almost Wasn’t

  1. I know what you mean. I had a gigantic gap in my posts for a while back in February for the exact same reason. Just know that we’re here for you when you’re ready to open up. Hope your next 10 days are better than these last 10 :).

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  2. Absolutely know what you mean ! I ” went dark” for a while ! Everything that helped me before , everything I voraciously read about staying sober just seemed to irritate me ! Believe me ! That’s a warning sign that’s a prelapse sign ! I think it’s the sober blogging community version of isolating ! It was a good idea to take your son to the store ! You’re definitely doing different !

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