- If I can think through this is I will be happy. This implies placing thoughts into the future. I do this when a problem comes up. I like to have at least three viable alternatives. Such as – I may get a new boss so, I work out leaving my job, it ends up being a terrific new boss, starting my own business etc. I like to imagine myself in the future happy so I can avoid any discomfort that having a new boss would bring. Hello! I don’t have a new boss! But I spent a lot of thought time planning for a future that may not happen.
- Interrupt the thought with moments of “it’s a thought”. Example – One: I work out and my muscles feel a lovely burn. Two: I don’t work out and wake up with the same burning muscles. The doctor says it’s a fatal muscle disease. Three: The feeling is the same. It is the concept around it that changes. Four: Insert anger, fear, hunger, loneliness and do steps one, two, three.
- Finding the answer doesn’t make life better. Doing better stuff, shifts the energy and makes life better. I love to plot and plan my day but rarely do I do anything but plot and plan. Quit writing a blog post about plotting and planning and go do yoga already! haha
- Hold addictive cravings with profound kindness.
- Putting my hand over my heart and telling myself “It’s okay sweetheart”. This makes me cry every time. I need lots of self-love before I go out looking for love. My habitual way of dealing with myself is very far from my hand over my heart and being kind to myself. My experience will shift when I relate to myself in a compassionate way.
- In meditation I bring two heavy duffel bags. One is my past and all my memories, experiences and regrets. The other is my future, with all my worries, projections and fears. I slowly set down the heavy bags and all I am left with is the present. Feel the weight release.
- Refresh my routine. Come to my senses. Example: While showering use all 5 (6) senses. Touch, Smell (beautiful soap) Sound, Sight, Taste and Mind. Try this with my routines, like brushing teeth, putting on makeup, getting dressed.
- The “trance of not enough”. My deepest suffering is forgetting who I am. When I judge others it gives me a false sense of self-soothing. THIS IS A BIG ONE FOR ME! Wanting to be noticed is a false way to soothe my fear of not belonging, as is over consuming, overeating, alcoholism. I covered myself to make it through suffering, but then I started to identify with my covering (eg: craving covers up my shiny golden beautiful insides) Self-care will dissolve my defensive covering. It is a soul sadness to recognize how much of my life has been shaped by feeling bad about myself. I have been imprisoned by a sense of unworthiness.