What an incredible turn-around in my mental health by blogging (AKA – writing letters to my future self).
Reminder to me in a crappy place in the future: WRITE
And write frequently! It’s my own gratitude journal of snippets of life that I completely forget.
When I am hurting I get more isolated. I can’t tolerate any extra stimulation. Writing gets me out the door without leaving the Lazy-Boy recliner.
It’s my baby step back to socializing.
And when I share – it keeps my head clear. I dump those emotions onto paper or cyber paper and they get out of my head. It leaves room for the linear thoughts to work their magic. Bad self-talk thoughts feel like they carem around the inside of my skull. Bouncing around and gaining momentum. If I can get them out, it leaves my thoughts peaceful.
That’s what writing does.
My self-talk about shame can build up if I don’t release it. That release of shame ESPECIALLY at the beginning BEGAN the journey to healing.
“So girlfriend (haha sometimes I talk to myself like that) if you’re feeling like you want to pour a glass to escape – You Do That! Because in your fridge are lots of no alcohol solutions, including a chocolate milkshake!
Then take out your contacts and crawl into bed with a good book. Because once you go there, ain’t nobody gonna put those contacts back in, put on a bra, eat a salad and spend two more hours battling the voices in your head. You are DONE for the night. And it feels SO GOOD!
And one last reminder girlfriend, if you drink the night before, those nasty self-talk voices find you the minute you open your blood-shot eyes. So you escaped the night before, but now you have to battle an entire day of crap. If you go to bed, you get to wake up with your thoughts on straight. And sitting here in the early morning quiet with a cup of strong coffee and the exciting conclusion to a great book and all your friends in the blogging world sharing their strength, hope and love, it’s the right answer.”
Sending my future self much love from whenever you read this. You got this girlfriend!