Emptying out the new dishwasher my son showed me how he pushed the wine glasses back where I couldn’t reach them. HAHA Very funny, I said. Besides showing off how much taller he is than me, he sent me a not so subtle diss.
Both my boys have been involved in my decision to not drink. They have watched me succeed and fail. And most importantly, they have watched me try and try again. They definitely get that it’s hard to quit!
They give me the kind of encouragement that I like. One quick little statement and then acceptance. Understanding that adults get to make their own choices, good or bad.
I have shown them that same respect too. Several years ago, I asked my son to watch his feelings and behavior after he drank pop. He now tells his friends he is sober from soda for 3 years. I brought home some gorgeous cupcakes that I had been given as a thank you gift, and he wouldn’t even take a bite. He said he can’t eat rich food like that anymore. And it’s true for him! (I cant believe I even said – come on, one bite won’t hurt!) He can say no because it affects him differently than others. No big long reasons or excuses or even pressure from his mom.
Explaining to my other son that the ‘wine glass’ isn’t really a wine glass at all, it’s a very pretty (Pioneer Woman purple) water goblet. I asked him to move it back to the front and I told him I would use it for water from now on. (And I have!) I can’t change his mind about how he feels about my wine glass but I can show him that I will keep trying once again.