First I will start with WHY I’m here…I made a promise to myself to get out of my head and get my thoughts on virtual paper. It’s part of my asking for help and accountability.
Next is WHAT drove me here….(the short story) my health, or rather my not health. The shame of being sick.
Finally is HOW I’m moving forward….lots of yoga, water and rest and a plan that is focused on me. I spent the last few months trying to please staff & clients, which is a good thing, but I did it at the expense of my health.
I recognized too late that clients and staff lashing out were the result of their fear and not my work. I dropped my boundaries (out of my own fears) but by then I was too sick to fix anything.
The RANT…..Today I have to head back in there, even with a fever, and deal with three days of raging phone messages about the stimulus payment. I’m not alone, there have been reports of clients waiting in mobs outside of tax offices because we have locked our doors in fear. We don’t have answers. It’s not my fault that I prepared your tax return correctly. It’s not my fault that they change the PPL form at 1:30 am. Please leave me alone. Don’t tell me that your friend knows more than me. I only deal in facts and law and it is not okay to rewrite the law overnight.
Just writing this gives me anxiety. I am going to spend some time on the yoga mat before I face this day.